Category: Uncategorized

transgirlnausicaa:

nest:

its so fucking funny when people in straight relationships try to use top/bottom language to describe their sex lives. my housemate was talking about “topping” her boyfriend and i was like “you peg him?” and she got all disgusted and was like NO I JUST LIKE BEING ON TOP!!!!

we really really need to oppress the hets man they’re playing with fire they’re using ideas they dont understand. they’re running with scissors

hotcommunist:

hotcommunist:

at the therapist

me: this week has been so quiet and mysterious….I’ve been an 8 on the hozier scale of brooding and I’ve made love to the banshee

my therapist: for the last time “mysterious” is not a quantifiable mood and I don’t know what the fuck the hozier scale is

2 weeks later

my therapist, finally worn down by my nonsense: okay, you know what, tell me the scale

me, unrolling an ancient scroll i’ve been keeping in my rucksack for just this occasion:

1. awake at dawn communing with the owls

2. holding a wake for a fox i found in a forest that had hyacinths growing from its chest

3. titties

4. finding the baba yaga

5. covering myself from head to toe in peony petals and walking into the sea

6. swimming in a peat bog and discovering the toads are all lesbians

7. assembling ikea furniture for my wife

8. titties again, but avant garde 

9. inviting the banshee in for tea

10. crawling into the moss within an old hollow log deep in the forest and eating out persephone